She chose the quietest part of the day to run. The dawn. Away from the noise. Away from the eyes. She adjusted her scarf many times while running. She wasn’t used to it ! But it protected her from the early morning winter chill. She needed it NOW more than ever.
Today was a long, tough day for her at work, nonetheless, she decided to get to the runners party. Runner parties are famous for a reason. She knew it. The selfies, the glamour, the flaunting of those toned calves. Runners know how to party. Donned in her little black dress, She walked into the glitzy ambiance of the pub making heads turn. Confidence after all has no competition !
But before she got here, sometime back at home, she ripped open her 3 amazon delivery packets with the frenzy of a child opening his new toy. She looked at the contents, saw herself in the mirror and smiled! The colors she chose were pretty similar and still looked beautiful separately. New things had caught her fancy recently!
She thought to herself aloud, “before the maid comes in tomorrow morning, I must put these away”. She quickly opened her newly installed almirah, which was bought to store the staple beauty accessory of her life she couldn’t do without anymore – Wigs !!!
It was a secret. It was a secret that she now wore wigs. She had gone bald within 7 days of her first chemotherapy session. Inflicted by breast cancer, 6 months now, she hid her tearing reality from everyone.
And yet, She wasn’t jaded doing hospital rounds, undergoing tests. She shed a tear of happiness when her doctor gave her a go on running. She quickly went back to office and printed a lovely poster of Karen Newman!!! Newman was her hero from this day onwards.
At work she wore wigs. On runs, she wore a scarf.
She stopped running events. She was only learning to deal with herself first.
Strong and stoic, She was not going to succumb to this disease that came with extra fatigue, hormone wars and painful chemotherapy! She didn’t think of how long she would continue to hide the reality from the world. She went about what was needed to be done.
She ran slow, she fought fatigue. She promised herself to do everything to be declared cancer free and not without keeping the spirit high.
Before calling it a night, putting out her gear out for a super early morning run, putting out a new red scarf to cover her bald head and matching it with her red running shorts, she reminded her resilient self – dreams are formed in the doing, there are miles to ‘do’ before I sleep.